I have burnt two saucepans in the last twenty-four hours. The first was last night; I made popcorn in a hurry. I thought I was being clever when I added the sugar and (vegan) butter before the corn started to pop. I wasn't clever, and the popcorn was black. The second poor pot was just this very afternoon. I am experimenting with lentils. Today is the day of the yellow split pea dahl. Very authentic. I eat lentils a lot, all the bloody time. Mostly, I favour the red split lentil for its mushy consistency and user-friendly recipes. The yellow split pea requires 12 hours of soaking and 30 - 40 minutes of cooking. I forgot that water evaporates when on a hob. Oh dear, what a disaster.
Well, reader, if I haven't lost your interest now, I have either done very well in my witty recount of singed kitchenware, or you are a bit dull, or you are a bored lentil-lover.
Whichever one you are, welcome aboard to the Good Ship Cats-and-Things (which is what my username is, mainly because I couldn't think of a nice, witty or ironic postmodern name for myself, so the only thing that sprung to mind were cats, and things).
On Christmas Day 2006, after all the boozing and gorging had finished, a small collective of the pissed-up under 55's and over 15's gathered together in the living room at around midnight. I have an aunt Debbie who has a boyfriend Brian and he is American. He has lots of crazy ideas about 'individualism' and 'letting people hear your voice'. Bless his little democratic soul. In his drunkeness he advised me to tell the world my story... via the web. I should blog, he told me, it'd be fascinating, he promised. I told him he was wrong but he shook his little Conneticut head and convinced me. Three months later and look at this, I'm doing it, I'm blogging!
I maintain that this is only because I haven't had sex in a long, long time. And I have finished lectures forever now, with only the next 2 months ahead of me to write essays and revise for my Finals. And everyone I know, bar about 3 people, has left this tiny university town. Or, they will have left by Wednesday and that will leave me alone in this flat, well, it will leave me and my housemate Juliana alone in this flat. Maybe we will go mental in this cosy little basement flat?
I have 12000 words to write in a month and nothing else but the brief intermission of Easter to keep me going. And I have recently turned vegan, so no easter eggs to keep me sane. But I shouldn't moan, not when I have yellow split pea dahl on the hob and enough clean knickers in my draw to last me until April.
